adventures in awesomeness…

My Fabulous Three Day Fast

… ended at 1:08pm PST.

My imagination differs only slightly from the reality…

I drank water for breakfast. Then half a cup of V8 (which is just so, SO gross). Then I took out the frying pan to make eggs. Just wait till Matt gets up, I thought to myself, hoping he could help me with my “will power”. I try to keep myself busy, but by 10:30am, I decided Matt needed to wake up. I threw open the door, slammed my elbows into the palm of my hand, and with a wild yell, I charged from the hallway to the bedroom and sprang into the bed like a lioness on a gazelle. He did not like that so much. But, he got up. =)

After sucking down a cup of coffee, we enjoy the gorgeous No-Ho weather with an hour-long bike ride. Everything smells like calories. Chew-able calories. We get home and I break down. Activia Yogurt, because, well, I need to poop. Still hungry. Start cooking veggie patty. Taking too long! Cold canned green beans. Ah… slowly… feeling… normal.

With the fast officially over, I have a hearty dinner of beans, cheese, a tortilla, a veggie patty, oranges and blueberries. At 630 calories, it was more than I had consumed in the two prior days, but I had no guilt about any of it. I was too busy eating.

When I got up this morning I had fully planned to eat breakfast, but when I stepped on the scale, I was down 2.7 pounds which has given me the motivation to try to go another day. It’s not really “fasting” at this point, because there was only one day that I didn’t actually eat anything, and on no days did I not consume any calories, but it’s nice to have a stomach that isn’t carrying around a second trimester food baby.

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On the Twelfth Day of Christmas My True Love Gave to Me…

Twelve failed experimental “cookies”, Eleven Pecan Shortbreads, Ten Snowy Tree-tops, Nine Linzer Cookies, Eight Brazil-Nut Crescents, Seven Squirming Snapshots, Six Super Strikes, FIVE MOMENTS OF PEACE!!!!! Four Yummy Chocolate Crinkles, Three Rock-hard Sugar Cookies, Two Chocolate Melting Moments and some fabulously delicious Checkerboard Coook-kiiiees!

Christmas Cookies — FAIL

Um, so yeeeaahh…. this is what happens when you are overstretched with raising two fighting children, cleaning the house, pushing the small swimming pool of water off your balcony so you can do your laundry without having to wear Matt’s  “date boots”, shopping for last minute Christmas gifts, and then in your 5 minutes of spare time, try to “invent” new and improved cookie recipes.

Apparently no matter how long you freeze it, brownie mix from the store just won’t form a neat little ball that looks like a Chocolate Crinkle stuffed with a hazelnut to taste like a Ferrero Rocher. And I want to say “Well, they’re ugly but they taste good.” Nope. They are bad. Bad all around…. sigh. Time to hit the wrapping paper and Bud Light.

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