adventures in awesomeness…

The Spanking.

on September 14, 2010

So I know it’s pretty much criminal to spank your kids nowadays because spankings lead to serial killers, rapists, and tea-partists (or marxist-liberals, depending on your viewpoint).

However… I have found that the spanking (most importantly, the threat of a spanking) is in fact a very useful tool in my parental discipline belt. The first time I used spanking, it wasn’t effective at all. My eldest son laughed, then proceeded to thrust his butt into the air and patted his butt again. So, I went back to “No, no!” and just being a human barrier between Jaxon’s curious little fingers and whatever it was they wanted to get into. And I must say, it worked pretty well.

Until a few months ago, when my children were kidnapped by witches and replaced with changelings.

My sweet, well-behaved children.

Two wild and crazy imps, masquerading as children.

“No” was a joke and time out…? Oh you mean peek-a-boo with brother while Mama is trying to corral two little wild ones both into different corners? And then I lost it and spanked the babies. And I spanked them good. But while I felt better that they no longer thought that destroying the house was a game, it didn’t have a long-term effect. Plus, you really can’t wallop your kids in public because you get mad. Well you can, but who wants to risk someone reporting you to CPS? My kids aren’t that bad. So instead I give them a choice. They can do what I ask, or they can get a spanking. After getting a good swatting for running away up two flights of stairs, Little Mylo thought twice about getting up from bed.

Go to bed Little Mylo. He throws himself on the ground, screaming. Do you want a spanking? He says “No” in that oh-so adorable Mylo voice. Then get into your bed. One, twoooo… (two is always dragged out, just to give them a running chance) and before I could say three, he hopped up and scurried over to his bed and put his head on the pillow.

Yes! Me: 1, babies: 0


One response to “The Spanking.

  1. Matt says:

    This post is hilarious, but on a serious note – I’ve already noticed Mylo being a lot better!!

    Mylo’s more aggressive than Jax. He’s going to take more work!!! hehe.

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